Merry End of Holidays

We survived Christmas, although barely, and are just trying to make it past New Years. The hardest thing about this whole holiday thing? Maintaining my good habits. I don't have many, good habits, and my whole world is being rocked with all the bad things influencing me right now. Mainly my diet, which consists of sugar, chocolate, dessert, and carbs, and flossing, which is a bad thing when my diet is as listed above. The first couple of days I felt awful, sick to my stomach, after eating anything sweet. Now, my body is embracing my old lifestyle and I'm craving it more and more. This.Must.Stop. I think we should just toss out all the goodies in the house. But first I want to eat that box of delicious chocolates The Bear gave me. Mmmmm......

This brings up the topic of resolutions for the new year. I've been instructed to find 5....for myself....and then as a couple we will set another 5. TEN???? That is a lot of potential failure. I'm trying to set realistic goals. Like, get better at yoga instead of do yoga 5 times a week. Or, lose at least 1 lb each month until goal weight is reached. It would take me 3 years at that rate but it allows some room for a bad month.

Not sure what my couple goals will be. Is, "stop being a nagging bitch," realistic? Probably not. Neither is, keeping my house clean all the time, always putting my dishes in the dishwasher, sweeping every day (or once a week), discontinue critical behaviors, have a bra on by 10 AM every day, brush my teeth by 10 AM every day, drink less coffee (blasphemy!), or stop napping during Mads morning nap. Not all couple goals, but you get how hard this is going to be for me.

I wish I could make the dog set a resolution. It would be, "stop hogging mama's side of the bed because it makes her regret letting me sleep with them."

And for Mad's it would be, "stop screaming like a banshee during diaper changes for no apparent reason."


Unfortunately I doubt those are reasonable either. But seriously, the diaper changes are extremely difficult these days. When I changed her while out shopping last week she was freaking out so much that I thought she was injured. I'm officially that mom everyone looks at and judges. I want to wave my arms around and tell everyone that I really am a good mom. Most of the time.

Maybe my blogging goal could be to start using punctuation correctly. I don't think that's realistic either. And not very fun. What is fun is enjoying the rest of Christmas break like this.....

Weekend Update

Yesterday I had the flu. It was awful. I can't thank myself enough for getting sick on the weekend though, when The Bear is home from work to help me out. I threw up on the side of the road because I thought I was better when I really wasn't. Thankfully it only lasted 24 hours.

Tonight Mr. Bear and I sat outside under the stars. We talked and watched old videos of Baby Bear on his Iphone. I admit I cried, I just miss my little itsy baby so much (but I love my big independent baby too). Little babies make me cry a lot. My friend has the sweetest little baby girl and I just well up with tears when I see her pictures too. Sometimes I see little babies in public places and I stare a lot and make weird "awww cute" holding back tears at the sweetness, mama faces at them. I can't help myself. Maybe it's a lack of sleep, maybe I just haven't been snuggling enough with my sweet girl since she's been sleeping all night in her own bed. Maybe the milk in my chest pushes tears out of my eyes involuntarily. Who knows.

Speaking of tears. I just bought a swimming suit. In 4-7 days I'm really going to have something to cry about. At least I got a bottom with a tummy control option. That's a good thing right? RIGHT??? Ok, how about this. At least I got 10 bucks off plus free shipping. My advice to free stuff while online shopping is to Google search "company name" coupon codes. Works almost every time.

To end I have to share some sweet pics of Baby Bear. Mr. Bear's brother and I put our heads together and did this photo shoot in his living room. I love them but everyone keeps saying the balloons makes it look like a birthday shoot. Haters. Thanks B for spending so much time on this for me. M&m love you lots.

Swim Suit (un)Ready

Ahhh Summer! How I've missed you. I feel like I've said that before. Probably because I say it EVERY year. I love the warm weather. love.love.love.LOVE!!! Over the past month Baby Bear and I have found every excuse to go outside when the sun has been shining, even just a little. Saturday we went for a walk to the park by the house and she enjoyed some time on the swings and I even took her down the slide (Mama is too big!). Last night Mr. Bear bought Baby a little blow up pool that had a big crab sun cover and this afternoon I took her outside for a swim. She loved it. LOVED! I loved being out in the sun too and was thrilled when I came in to see some pink on my cheeks. It feels like it's been so long! Baby Bear entertained herself the whole time, splashing and babbling while I sat next to the pool and watched/enjoyed the sun on my skin. It was so perfect that I hope to do it a couple more times this week, if the weather allows.

*Baby Bear sporting her cute swimming suit from daddy (she was just a little lump when he picked it out for her!)



In other, more tragic, news Mr. Bear and I have decided that TOGETHER we will start a new "diet" and workout plan. In the past I've said that I'll watch what I eat (but I don't) and he just doesn't eat anything so I'm stuck trying to do dinner alone which results in shitty meals and an everlasting belly pooch. Out diet isn't anything fancy. We just have pre-written meals and every day I write down what we will eat and that is exactly what we do. We also drink at least 8 glasses of water and do increased amounts of cardio/weights every.single.day. Well, maybe we'll get one day off.

I'm halfway through my first day and pretty much would kill a cow for some sugar and a Dr. Pepper. I've done my weight/resistance training off of some videos online. Basically I have no stomach muscles and I'm really out of shape. When I started the video I thought, "there is no way this can be an actual work out". I changed my mind when I tried to walk up the stairs an hour later. It was a humbling experience to say the least. I have to wonder how I went from a woman who could hop on the elliptical trainer and do 45 minutes of intense aerobic training like it was no big deal to this lump of fat that feels awkward trying to do one lunge. One little baby made me this way? It's really sad and, as I said a moment ago, incredibly humbling.

So here's to saying goodbye to these last 40 lbs of unwanted baby weight and HELLO! to being thin enough to find designer jeans in my size at The Rack. Oh, and in shape too. By the end of the summer I'm going to have a toddling baby to keep up with and I don't want her to be ashamed of me. Maybe in a couple months I'll be able to post a picture of me in a pool WITH my Bear. HAHAHAHA....but seriously.