Friday, May 25, 2012

Belated Mother's Day Post

I really missed out on talking about Mother's Day, about how much I love being a mama to my sweet Mad girl and how excited I am to watch my first baby love this new baby. Maybe it's a cliche to be so happy "just" being a mama but if it is I don't care, I love it and I'm not ashamed to shout it from the roof tops, or the top of Facebook which is what I do on a daily basis. So I'll just give a little shout out right now.....belated as it may be.
Riding the carousel at the Zoo. I had to steal this from Stephen's FB page so forgive the blur.
 To be honest I never knew how much I would love it. When I was a kid it was just what every other little girl wanted to do, so I wanted it too. I loved babies, especially my sweet brown haired baby sister who I adored from the moment I saw her tiny face (I don't recall the birth of my other younger sister much but my parents say I adored her just as much), but as I got older I questioned my own ability to be a good mother. One with patience, one smart enough to teach her children all the things they need to know (I won't lie the thought of teaching my Mad how to read still petrifies me!), it all felt very intimidating.

So being thrown head first into motherhood really worked out well for me. I was better than I thought I'd be but old enough to know my struggles and I still have to work on them every single day. And that's it. I love it even when I want to pull my hair out. Because that is part of motherhood you know. I'm surprised my own mother has any hair on her head because God knows what hell we've all put her through.

On that note I'll say that I'm lucky to have had the best mother in the world because I'd probably be a lot worse than I am if I didn't have such an amazing example of what motherhood should be. I only wish she thought she was as amazing as ALL of her children do. Even if/when we don't show it the way we should.

I also missed out on a birthday post for my AngryBear. He deserved a great one because he is so wonderful. It doesn't take much for me to look around and see that I lucked out when he fell in love with me and put up with all of my nonsense (he still does!). Father's Day is coming up and I can't wait to give him a post that is deserving of him. Also, he is OLD you guys. That means in a few years I'll be old too. Not looking forward to it!
Maddie loves her daddy. Another stolen FB picture.

Friday, May 11, 2012

A Sleep Story

A week, or two, ago I wrote a post about sleep. Not my sleep, though I am involved, but baby/toddler/kid sleep and what "they" do and don't tell you to expect and what of all that is actually true, in my humble experience. But as I wrote it just all got jumbled and I lost what I was really trying to say. Does that ever happen to you? It happens to me all the time. So I bagged it and didn't write anything for a while. Luckily for me I'm not a real blogger so this is totally ok.

I have been wanting to write about sleep though and I really am going to do it, right now. Our battle with sleep has been long and difficult. It's caused many tears and fights and worries about if I am doing anything right at all. Just last night The Bear walked down the stairs and gave me "the eyes" from the doorway. "What's wrong?" I asked, or something to that effect. "She's still awake," he growled, not really at me but at the Universe in general, or maybe at me but if that's the case I'm oblivious & also I shouldn't be saying so on my blog. "Send her down to me but tell her she's sleeping in the little bed."
Passed out on the couch, mama bed napping with the kitty, sleeping on the floor of her bedroom, sleeping in her bed with her favorite napping blanket. P.S. we have gotten rid of the binky since some of these pictures were taken
 The little bed is an Ikea crib mattress that sits on the floor, with sheets blankets and pillows, next to my side of the bed. The intention was to get her out of our bed with the hopes that she might tire of sleeping on the floor and start going back to sleep in her own bed. Some nights she doesn't ask to sleep in our bed with us at all she just come down, wakes me for good measure, and gets comfy somewhere on the floor and sleeps the rest of the night. Other nights she asks to get in bed with us and cries if I say no. Then she asks for water, medicine (because she likes the idea of something being wrong to add to her drama), hand holding and songs and I give her all but medicine unless of course there really is something wrong.
The Little Bed. It's a great play spot during the day when mama needs to rest. 
 So, most nights we get the bed to ourselves and it has vastly improved my quality of sleep. With Mr. Bear I'm never quite sure because even if I hear him snoring all night long he never seems to have gotten the right amount or type of sleep he needs to feel rested. Sometimes I still let her in my bed, because I can't lie and say that I don't love it when we can all get comfy. She is soft and warm and when she is snuggled in our bed on a good night we don't wake at all until morning which means I feel more rested. I worry about what happens when the little baby arrives and takes the coveted spot at my bedside in the little co-sleeper. Hopefully she and Mr. Bear are both ok with the transition to his side of the bed.
Napping in mama's bed after an afternoon outing, family naps on the weekend, the snuggles that make all the difficult times worthwhile.
With all the difficulty we have faced there remains the silver lining which is nap time. It's not always easy to get her to go down, in fact, just the other day we had a face off that is terrifying to recall. Usually this only happens when she is overtired and expecting something fun like visits from friends or a Grammy night. Anyway, no it isn't always a walk in the park but the days of missed naps are few and far between and I'd say that even with the struggle the nap is well worth it. For her and for me. She knows to expect it and I think some days she actually looks forward to it. She'll be 3 this September and I know nap time is going to fade into a distant memory eventually but hopefully not too soon. My girl who wakes at least once every night and is up with the sun every morning needs that extra hour or two of sleep and I savor every snuggle I get with her during these times.

So, that is our current sleep story. What's yours?

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