Friday, April 13, 2012

The Goodness of Spring

Life has just been so busy and writing has just seemed like so much work lately. So, I don't do it. And then I'm sad because I wish I did. Then I sit down to write and I remember why it is so much work because I have all these thoughts and memories in my head and trying to put them down is extremely difficult.

April is a month of birthdays and my youngest sister turned 21!
Everything seems to be at such a peaceful place right now. That is exactly how I want it. I want to be calm, and happy.....I know that it's just a matter of looking around me, watching my girl play, feeling this newest baby kick and squirm around inside me, anxiously waiting for the end of the day for my husband to be with us again, listening to the laughter that brightens every morning in our home, and I can't deny how much happiness I have. That's not to say that there aren't difficult things but right now, at this point, I'm choosing to forget about that and just be content. A person only has control over their own direct choices and life and I want mine to be good. It's that easy really. If I ever feel like crying? I listen to happy music, or color in a coloring book. I mean HELLO, what tears could not be dried over coloring Disney Princesses???
Coffee, food, and my baby girl....this is every day and I like it
I am making a huge effort to spend this pregnancy overwhelmed with the good. I really believe it is a positive thing for this baby and for this birth, which I am already trying to prepare myself for. With my beautiful first baby I was so worried all the time. I obsessed over what her little face would look like, over how much she would weigh, if she would cry or nurse well, or if she would actually turn out a she. I cried worrying that there would be problems or that labor would hurt so much or that somehow I wouldn't be able to do it. As if there was really any option once things got started anyway, so silly of me. But it felt real. All that anxiety was real to me and I allowed myself to feel it. This time? It just isn't an option. I'm calm and relaxed, and if I'm not I'm pretending that I am anyway. I don't worry about anything except for the moment I am in, the kicks I am feeling, the roundness I'm trying to appreciate, the way my daughter cups my belly with her arms and whisper yells to her sibling about her love for him/her, and how she demands I do not cover the baby with clothing, which I get around by telling her the baby is coldy (coldie? It's our way cuter way of saying cold) and that totally makes sense to her!
Our kitties love Mad - My very best lunch date - Book reading together - 22 week baby
I'm feeling the extra happiness of Spring and can't wait to spend every day outside in the sun. I think the baby would like that and I KNOW my little outside girl will too. This mama could use some Vitamin D to keep her pumped up with happy with little to no effort, which is exactly what Spring brings. Happy Spring everyone, I hope it makes everything look a little brighter for everyone.
Such a cute and happy Easter girl
P.S. My new favorite Iphone app, Frametastic. I don't even use a regular camera these days and this is a fun way to catalog my many pictures.

1 comment:

Ashlie and Chris Seipert said...

Just what I neeeded. Thank you for always pointing out the positive things around me. Love you.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...