Mr. Bear and I were talking tonight about compassion. About the truest form of compassion and who it impacts the most. Those who are on the receiving end of compassion? Or those offering it?
All I really have to base my ideas on are my own experiences. And truthfully, as I said tonight, I am a happier more self satisfied person when I exercise compassion consistently in my daily life.
I need/want to get back to a place where I am this person more often. My own balance is off lately. I feel frustrated more often than I would like to (wait, would I ever like to feel frustrated???). I feel myself judging more and searching for understanding less. I feel that that the example I am setting for my child, who perhaps cannot understand yet but will someday, is not ultimately in harmony with the person I hope she will strive to be.
I'm struggling to think of a way to remind myself, when I make a mistake, that those actions aren't part of who I want to be and to correct them. So often I find myself slipping up or forgetting and then just moving on without rationally changing my perspective at that very moment.
So, I don't have all the answers but I am committed to making a change in my attitude, thoughts, & behavior towards others and just life in general. It's important for me to start behaving like the person I know I am inside. For the good of myself and my family. I don't think this part of myself is buried that deep but I have certainly lost track of her lately.
I was reminded this week just how lucky I am. I am loved by, and in love with, my two bears. They don't judge me for my mistakes but they encourage me to strive to be a better person. When I hold my daughter close I feel peace and love. When I struggle with life's great questions I have the wisdom of a loving partner to lean on. What more could I ask for?